As some of you may know, my hometown is Stockton CA…
And in early February Forbes declared my hometown the most miserable city in the entire country. Since I dont live there any more and have several friends who do, my first reaction was to laugh my ass off.
Then I actually read the article and felt bad, but still laughed my ass off and made sure to post the article and all its information on every social profile I have to desecrate my friends still stuck in Stockton.
The article mentioned how they ranked the cities, and explained…
“Stockton ranks in the bottom seven in four of the nine categories we looked at: commute times, income tax rates, unemployment and violent crime. Only New York City has a higher income tax rate than what Stockton, and all California residents, are forced to pay.”
Wow. I was aware, even as a child, Stockton had a reputation for things 
such as highest murder rate per square mile and highest car theft during the holidays.. but sweet jesus, most miserable city in the U.S. God damn. That includes places like “every city” in Utah, where mormons thrive and alcoholic beverages are watered down, and illegal on sunday. Thats brutal… But then again from the time I was 12 to 17 I had a gun pulled on me and was threated by death 4 times. So, I understand the difficulties in living there.
Something I was not aware of is that Stockton was number 2 the year prior! Stockton isnt new to misery and shittyness apparently, even to people who dont live there. Yet, something still stirs in my belly to hear shit talking about my hometown.. Theres a level of comradery in misery and any Stockton native still has a soft spot for the place. Whether it be a “209″ reference on a myspace page, or a “stocktown” verbal reference… Something about that shithole makes you miss the few people you were able to find who didnt want to rape and or murder you. Its like making best pals with the bad ass in prison who will protect you from anal rape… its comforting… and you could remember a person like that the rest of your life.
I was the first person within a large group of friends to leave Stockton, and one of few who hasn’t been forced to move back and I take pride in the fact im 2 minutes from the beach and 6 hours away from the rectal cavity of California. But I’ll always have a friend in a Stocktonian, they are the only ones who share the same level. Yet let me make this clear… Im not looking to make a new Stockton friend, I dont need crackheads and crackwhores emailing me for friendship.. I made my friends there and Im done. Loyalties and ties remain but no new ones need to be formed. YOU HEAR ME!!?
209 Fo’ Life son..
