This Hot Fire

Its happening again… A politician is buying their government seat, only this time its breaking records. Meg Whitman has officially become the largest self funded candidate in American history.

This is the best restaurant policy Ive ever heard of, and I want it in place at every restaurant except Chuck E Cheese and other ‘kid friendly’ locales. Actually, fuck it.. this policy should be every where.

Help me MAKE THIS HAPPEN!!!

The story is based mostly around hamster cops that fall into cases ranging much like cases on Law and Order, or CSI, but in a spoofy comedic way.

Oh you read that shit right… Papa Mitch is tackling my generations big conspiracy theory, and the perspectives on both sides.

Yes.. a fungus.. takes control of minds and bodies.. much like a zombie virus. I just shit in my pants a little bit and have decided to start hoarding shotguns and flame throwers.

So apparently childhood obesity is a problem, and Banning Happy meals and other fast food packages that entice kids like a trenchcoated man with a lollipop looks like a good idea.

There have been multiple times when I felt like Id rather shoot myself in the dick than agree with Bill O Reilly, just on principle alone. Yet today I agree with him, but don’t want to shoot my weener.

Maybe there is a 2012 conspiracy… maybe theres an asteroid coming… maybe some crazy rich guy is developing a super virus to ‘cleanse’ the planet.. Maybe a James Bond villain is about to poison our atmosphere so we all have to live under the sea.. I DON’T KNOW FOR SURE.

The first time I heard about Justin Bieber I was told ‘some new faggy little kid is making twilight fans cream their pants.’