SWINE FLU!! BOOGAH BOOGAH BOOGAH!! BE SCARED!!
God dammit! Stop giving me reports about the damn swine flu! Dear lord someone has flu like symptoms!? No way!
7 up and chicken soup has cured multiple cases.
The World Health Organization has stated there is no evidence the virus is transmitted by food, and the deaths related to it were to the elderly, to children and to already ill individuals. ISNT THAT THE SAME FUCKING THING WITH HUMAN FLU!?!? I hate the media and I hate Mexico for undoubtedly letting children play in pig shit.
Recently the “outbreak” has hit southern CA… my homeland. Am I afraid? No im not afraid, know why? Because this is all a huge load of bullshit blown out of proportion. Let me know when it mutates and kills a perfectly healthy 25 year old triathlete, then I will tremble in fear. The latest case was a marine at a San Bernadino base, and guess what? He didn’t die. He suffered from flu like symptoms and now says he feels pretty good and is up and around performing regular work. Yet they still quarantined all 39 troops at the base.
In L.A. county there are four cases, two probable, and two possible. An 11 year old, 69 year old, 60 year old and 52 year old. Sweet, some old people, and a rugrat might die. Holy shit! Lock down the city theyre in! Regular ol influenza kills old people and young kids all the time… now that its derived from little piggys, everyone should be frightened! Oh yea, the first death has occurred from swine flu in the U.S. now you’ve got a 50/50 shot at the age of the victim… old or young. SURVEY SAYS!! 23 months old! The parents also stated he had underlying health problems. OH MY!
The Governator, A. Schwarzenegger declared a state of emergency on Tuesday, and have experts warning the public to take the swine flu seriously. Good ol FOX news is also declaring their own global pandemic.
Lick my balls.
Please, do me a favor… anyone reading this. DO NOT GET A SWINE FLU VACCINE. They haven’t made it yet, but guess what? The last time a “pandemic was imminent” they made a vaccine and the vaccine killed more people overall than the god damn virus. So please educate yourself, and when they do starting making the vaccine, steer clear.
“Good ol FOX news is also declaring their own global pandemic.”
awww low blow buddy. its’ not just fox news my friend, it’s ALL the media outlets. don’t just blast one biased news org, get them all.
also
“Oh yea, the first death has occurred from swine flu in the U.S. now you’ve got a 50/50 shot at the age of the victim… old or young. SURVEY SAYS!! 23 months old! The parents also stated he had underlying health problems. OH MY!”
fun fact, the 23 month old that died, is actually a child from mexico, who parents brought him across the border to recieve medical attention for his swine flu..
thus no america has died yet.
America – gays = strongest race ever.
I think the concern with swine flu is because of its history. Do i know it? No. not really. Do I care? No not really. I don’t care because I am immune to diseases not because I choose to believe it’s a weak virus like a certain someone I know. Swine flu is going to be attenuated until next fall when temperatures drop again. For now, enjoy your summer because you will be swined before the Winter takes your life after your pitiful condition has drained tears of unfathomable sadness from your mother.
What’s about to kill you: http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v311/zacsxe/Funnies/1210719961.jpg
Im so tired of hearing about this nonsense. Every channel has something to say about this. LEAVE ME ALONE!
I want the biggest piece of bacon possible.
Right now.
We must consume all of the pigs before their gay flu consumes us ALL.
Haha!!! Whoever Zac is sucks……..if he’s for real, he can eat u know what! It’s all a crock and I completely agree that it’s all BS!!!
The flu outbreak in humans is due to a new strain of influenza A virus subtype H1N1 that contained genes most closely related to swine influenza. This strain can be transmitted from human to human, and causes the normal symptoms of influenza.
In 1918 there was a huge worldwide pandemic, and most of its victims were healthy young adults, as opposed to now which predominantly affect juvenile, elderly, or otherwise weakened patients.
So like you said, until a 25 year old triathlete dies from the swine flu… it has been covered by the media plenty.
Dont care.
You know what I do care about? This sexual tension I’m sensing in my pants between Zac and Miss Cyn. Is it getting hot in here or is it just me? All I know is that Cyn wants some Zac and I’m not going to stand in the way. Just like when I was a kid and I got in the way of my friend shaboinking some dude just because he too was a dude and I thought that wasn’t cool. Needless to say I didn’t sleep with anyone that night and they killed themselves. The point of the story is that if you love someone’s pants then you should sleep with the same sex because kids are confused. If swine flu is really keeping you from expressing yourselves then you should be ashamed of yourself because I put googly eyes on my cactus to keep them from being so scary looking! THEY COULD TOTALLY FUCKING GANG UP ON YOU WHILE YOU SLEEP AND FUCKING STAP YOUR DICK! What would my thought be if that happened? It would be that I always suspected the cacti. So make eye contact with your kids because you never know who they are sleeping with and it could be scary. If you’re ashamed of eye contact then read them a book about why fucking pigs is wrong! And there it is….I just solved your fucking swine flu problem! Some poor beaner sap didn’t read to his fucking kids at night so then the kid fucked a pig with another boy, whom we’ll call Bean, and swine flu was invented. Next week I shall deduce why Mitch has an inferiority complex….hint: he saw me naked in the shower.
not going to go in depth here. Im simply going to say 2 things.
1. James are you fucking retarded?
and
2. I hate you James
shhhh! Don’t blow my cover! I’m Mr. Angry Eyes now! Just like when I was a kid and I was watching Toy Story and Mr. Potato Head says “get ready to meet Mr. Angry Eyes!” and instead of putting on his Angry Eyes he puts on his shoes and rampages a wall then falls over! Man I’m funny!
Awesome articles on this site man, I found you on zimbio looking for random crap about swine flu. Im still reading all the other articles..
Keep it up, Ive got you in my RSS feed
Swine flu? Please! Nothing is as scary as “The Clap”. Try pissing razor blades for a week, now THATS a force to be reckoned with.
I shitted my pants reading Jamess’ reson for swine flu…that was great…i read it twice it was so fucking funny. Thanks James for that wonderful writing.
” Blame it on the flu, got you feelin blue
Blame it on the swine, got you feelin blind
Blame it on the Mex, Mex, Mex, Mex Mexicans “
Im with Rick… I am much more afraid of the god awful pain of pissing razor blades. no more CLAP!
Stephen, id like an audio clip of you singing those swine flu lyrics..
Cyn, I agree with James in that I, too, believe you want a piece of this. I must warn you, however, that, just like swine flu, sexing me will have consequences. In my case, I’ve already infected my girlfriend with a fever—yellow fever. BOOYA!
Mitch Higgins, I declare you new emperor OF THE WORLD.
Love this writing man, keeps me busy at work all the time. Keep it up.
mitch is just my puppet. He’s the pretty face behind the operation, imt he brains.
damn mitch and his good looks.
Hey found you on zoombia and technorati so I came to check this out. Great writing on this site man, and THANK YOU for ripping this swine flu bullshit apart.
RSS’d
Hey great web site, found you on google. I was just sitting up here on the coast in oregon riding out the latest storm and BOOM I found your site. Now I have to comment on the swine flu pandemic. I know a guy who knows a girl who knows a guy who got the Mexican version of the H1M1 swine flu and this guy now has a corkscrew for a weiner, he does not think that this flu is bullshit.
LMAO!! (I think I start all my responses with that) I’ve been waiting for you to write this article.. I knew it would come soon.
jan and jak—–
“I know a guy who knows a girl who knows a guy who got the Mexican version of the H1M1 swine flu and this guy now has a corkscrew for a weiner, he does not think that this flu is bullshit.”
FUCKING HILARIOUS!! Sorry if its true…
I think it’s funny how people are going out and buying face masks so they don’t get the flu, but people still have problems using condoms and are spreading AIDS!!! WTF.. something just isn’t right there.
touche’ Sarah…
but with AIDS and condoms… i dont see the correlation to face masks and swine flu. Does wearing a facemask take away all the feeling of breathing???
What’s the point of getting aids if you can’t spread it?
The news media just loves something – anything to jump on and blow up out of all proportion. Swine flu, bird flu, cat next door flu, anything to hype up. Don’t forget, the more people they get watching, the happier their sponsors are
K F C