This Hot Fire Ridiculing pop culture like a hooker at a PTA meeting
  • Home
  • About
  • Contact
  • Archives

Subscribe via: RSS EMAIL

  • Mitch and Kevo Show
  • Mitchellanious
  • Previews
    • Movies coming soon
    • Video Games coming soon
  • Reviews
    • Movies
    • Music
    • T.V.
    • Video games
  • Sports
  • Wall of Heroes

Categorized | Mitchellanious

Tags : how to sell a testicle, selling a testicle, testicle donation, testicle sale, where can i sell a testicle

Selling a Testicle For Money

Posted on 19 August 2009

Selling a testicle for money

I was first exposed to the idea of selling one of my nuts for money on a long car ride with my buddy Kevin Rogers.  Like on most long car rides conversation got weirder and weirder and eventually came to the question “would you eat a cup of poo for a million dollars?”  But I digress…  In the middle some where it was mentioned that Kevins brother explained he could sell a testicle for $60,000.   Immediately upon hearing this I was disgusted, and repulsed but slowly thought more about the idea.

testiclesIve got 2 nuts, and you only need one to spread the Mitchy seed.  They’ve also got prosthetic nad’s they can ram in your sack.  I sell one ball and get $60,000.  So tempting. I always thought about it but never researched it because I never thought I could actually go through with cutting off one of my boys.

Its been 7 years since that fateful conversation and after more than 7 years of the real world ass raping me and making me its bitch, the idea of selling one of my gonads has become very attractive.  So during recent months, with the recession in full effect, Ive looked up lots of quick money solutions like sperm donation, blood plasma donation, prostitution, donating hair, and cutting out my friends kidney while he slept to sell on the black market.  Then I had the epiphany of the testicle sale, which would avoid a felony for assault with a deadly weapon.

So for days Ive google’d the living shit out of everything to do with testicle donation and found nothing.  Kidneys, partial livers, organ donor membership were all available but nothing of donating a ball.  Theres a lot of information out there about testicle cancer though… hope I never get that shit.  Yet I still cant find anything on selling my berry.  So im asking anyone out there, if you know anything about selling a testicle… to help  a guy out.  Where can you sell your testicle?

This post was written by:

Mitch Higgins - who has written 101 posts on This Hot Fire.

Mitch Higgins is a published author with National Lampoon press and has over a decade of writing experience. And he has a super big penis

Contact the author

65 Responses to “Selling a Testicle For Money”

  1. Mr. Angry Eyes says:
    August 19, 2009 at 1:39 AM

    thats, unfortunately, a long running black-market joke I think. I could be wrong but I, much like you, found nothing in days of researching that topic. STUPID JOKES! But really you gotta think of the practical uses of what to do with a random nut, which is nothing really.

  2. Scott says:
    August 19, 2009 at 9:37 AM

    Try E-Bay?

  3. Willy thrilly says:
    August 19, 2009 at 9:42 AM

    Silly pipe dreams. Cant sell your nad, sorry mitchy.

  4. Jr. says:
    August 19, 2009 at 10:36 AM

    I would so do it!!!

  5. Angie says:
    August 19, 2009 at 12:05 PM

    If guys can sell a ball, can chicks sell a boob? lol, they have prosthetic boobs too!

  6. ben jartlett says:
    August 19, 2009 at 1:53 PM

    http://www.snopes.com/college/medical/testicle.asp
    sorry buddy..

  7. Daniel Berbano says:
    August 19, 2009 at 3:20 PM

    Snopes is the killer of all that makes the world interesting….damn you Snopes for killing my dreams of making it out of the recession alive

  8. Adam says:
    August 19, 2009 at 5:02 PM

    FUCK!!!!!!!!!!

    There goes my backup plan.

  9. Randy schmidt says:
    August 20, 2009 at 9:40 AM

    Unfortunately I found out you couldnt sell a testicle long ago, but this article brought back that same desperate yet happy feeling I could get money for pretty much doing nothing. Ben Jartlett found a pretty good article, and its almost soul crushing to think I was pathetic enough to sell a testicle only to find out its not even real. FML.

  10. jack beeduh pops says:
    August 22, 2009 at 3:00 PM

    I clipped this tid bit off of a web article. I don’t think he wants to sell one of his testicles. OUCH MOMMY!!!

    Mariners third baseman Adrian Beltre, there really isn’t anyone to blame for the injury other than himself. Despite playing the hot corner and dealing with balls getting smashed his way at like 100mph and only 100 feet away, Beltre doesn’t wear a cup because they’re uncomfortable. While Beltre may have gotten by until this point, he finally got burned in Wednesday night’s 14-inning game against the White Sox. He might miss the rest of the season after taking a hard one-hopper to his groin off the bat of a White Sox player Thursday night.

  11. Joe thome says:
    August 23, 2009 at 12:10 PM

    Ive thought about selling body parts myself, but Ben is right its illegal. But so is smoking weed, and we see how strong that is followed. Somebody will pay for my kidney. And im finding out god dammit!!

  12. Wes says:
    August 24, 2009 at 2:19 AM

    My luck I’d win the lotto the next day.

  13. Randy g says:
    April 24, 2010 at 2:27 PM

    You honestly had me interested in selling one of my balls. Then I read the comments and had that dream crushed. Man, I would have done it so fast.

  14. steve says:
    June 3, 2010 at 8:18 PM

    i looked into doing this as well…

    i found an organization that paid me to perform a s.i.p.
    (“they didnt pay me for a testicle… that they kept… but paid me for the ‘test procedure’ that was performed successfully :P )

    granted i only received $25,000

    but its 25 g’s that i didnt have before…

    and i have a silicone testicle… that feels real!!!
    without the fleshy attachment in the front…

    recovery was about 3 weeks… (it fukin sucked!!!)
    its like getting punched in the balls… and having the pain for 3 weeks… sigh…

    if u dont know how that feels… grab a ball… and flick the crap out of it!!! dont graze it and call it good… hit it dead center…

    after you regain consciousness… yea thats how it feels…

    procedure took about 3 hours…

    but unfortunately im not allowed to give out info on where…

    BUT I DO KNOW FOR A FACT THAT THERE ARE MORE PLACES LOOKIN…

    so good luck!!!

  15. mel says:
    June 8, 2010 at 9:04 AM

    what is s.i.p.?

  16. steve says:
    June 8, 2010 at 2:14 PM

    they keep it vague and call it a silicone implant procedure…

  17. Ronnie says:
    June 8, 2010 at 2:20 PM

    I wanna know where!!! Ill do it RIGHT NOW!!

  18. steve says:
    June 8, 2010 at 2:22 PM

    other places might call it a testicular implant procedure or something…

    it was a while back so…

  19. steve says:
    June 8, 2010 at 2:27 PM

    i learned alot doing my homework and not just rushing for the money…

    their could be alot of problems down the road…

    like i said…

    do your homework…

    dont just look at a few pics and a single page article and call it good…

    yenno?

    anywayz…

    good luck im done with this site…

  20. Mitch Higgins says:
    June 8, 2010 at 2:54 PM

    Thanks for the info Steve. Im going to have to take a look around to find out some more information. Interesting to know. And sorry about the brutal pain buddy, haha. I feel for ya. Massive sympathy pains.

  21. Nba Jerseys says:
    June 12, 2010 at 1:05 AM

    Hi, I found this blog post, but are looking for shopping information on Google, and found it very good article to share, thanks greetings and cheers!

  22. Tifany Cumbie says:
    July 28, 2010 at 1:35 PM

    This site is so great that i will honor it with my comment :)

  23. monet C. says:
    August 3, 2010 at 4:14 PM

    hey is there anyway to get the info steve on what you wrote about??? please email me…..phili121_87@yahoo.com

  24. Chris P says:
    August 16, 2010 at 5:18 PM

    hey steve hit me up with that info at phibbs87@yahoo.com thanks bro

  25. john says:
    August 22, 2010 at 7:18 PM

    steve im very interested in the info you had ajjames830@gmail.com please email with info

  26. Kevin says:
    August 25, 2010 at 7:22 PM

    I found a place to donate and got paid for it your moms mouth this site fucking blows

  27. Kyle says:
    August 25, 2010 at 7:25 PM

    OMFG I fo8und a real place to sell my nuts they paid me 50k a nut. This is so fucking real, for agreements with my non-disclosure agreement I cannot say what the orgainization is that is looking for huge ballz. Though because I camm during the procedure they paide me a 6g bonus for the second nut:D.

  28. Akeem says:
    October 26, 2010 at 11:52 PM

    Kyle what did u search to find that discloser place. E mail me pbkeelo@yahoo.com

  29. akeem says:
    October 27, 2010 at 1:22 AM

    hey Kyle can you email me the information to how you found it please

  30. Lee says:
    October 31, 2010 at 1:32 PM

    Hey Kyle will you send me the info pleasde?

  31. Lee says:
    October 31, 2010 at 1:34 PM

    forgot to put my e-mail. j.p.spriggs@gmail.com

  32. Dustin says:
    November 26, 2010 at 9:48 PM

    Wow…. Kyle was kidding lol
    He said they paid him a bonus 6k for Cumming geez people

  33. Rhino says:
    November 29, 2010 at 9:06 PM

    So I’m interested and here is my email if there is such a non-disclosure place to do the procedure. Hell with this recession I dont’ care if I have to travel to south america or canada. Someone let me know. kingkubala @ yahoo.com

  34. Tim says:
    December 10, 2010 at 9:03 PM

    Hey im new to this but any info on selling a nut I will take it tplank55@yahoo.com thanks

  35. jack parsons says:
    December 29, 2010 at 10:13 AM

    IF ANYONE WILL SEND ME RELIABLE INFORMATION ON THE AFOREMENTIONED SUBJECT I WILL PAYPAL TRANSFER $50 TO YOUR ACCOUNT JUST FOR THE INFORMATION. CONTACTABLE: bittersweet42@xrs.net

    Testicle Donation information 25k – 50k.. etc
    Much jollies,
    cheers

  36. ADRIAN says:
    January 18, 2011 at 9:55 PM

    plz send me some info in you guys find where to do this. i also would like to sell my left nut for a quick buck!!!

  37. FRANK says:
    January 25, 2011 at 10:24 AM

    If anyone actually does know of any organizations that do this, please point me in the right direction. Harbortunnelsyndrome@gmail.com

  38. John says:
    February 8, 2011 at 11:43 PM

    Umm Im beginning my search into that as well I was told the LSU science center buys them im sure not 60,000@ but all I need is 5,000 for school and our lovely government refuses to help me…so maybe find your closest and biggest university and contact there science center…cant hurt to make a call ya know

  39. kingsley says:
    February 14, 2011 at 10:22 AM

    hey kyle, how can i get hold of this guys that pays for jumbo?

  40. derek says:
    February 28, 2011 at 4:14 PM

    COuld someone email me any of the secret info that cant be published? i wanna find out! derekmusic101@live.com

  41. ian says:
    March 8, 2011 at 9:25 AM

    hey guys. If you arent just trolling i’d love for some o the info. Contact me at isheppar@utk.edu please…i really need this money to pay for college…

  42. Jason says:
    March 27, 2011 at 5:07 PM

    I wish this was for real, seems pretty lame, two many jokers. I would sell my nuts, both of them, if I had the chance.

  43. brandon says:
    May 8, 2011 at 8:53 PM

    I am interested. If one of you could send me an email pointing me in the right direction for this it would much appreciated. jarlaxles_cape@hotmail.com

  44. Rusty says:
    May 15, 2011 at 8:01 AM

    I too am interested in the testicle donation for research for a small nominal fee. I would appreciate any help with who to contact about this donation. rgarland63@yahoo.com

  45. Will says:
    May 15, 2011 at 8:45 PM

    For fear of being redundant (though very skeptical)….. I’d like info on this “transplant” too. Email me at apo_4_life@yahoo.com

  46. jacob keeler says:
    May 16, 2011 at 11:39 AM

    NASTY FUCKS!!! who the hell would sell a nut they dumb as hell!!!

  47. darren says:
    May 19, 2011 at 3:57 PM

    how do in do that please e-mail me at
    d.ron666@hotmail.com

  48. paul says:
    June 10, 2011 at 11:20 AM

    We got two of them why b greedy?

  49. brian says:
    June 12, 2011 at 9:21 PM

    for 60,000 a pop i would gladly sell both my beans!!!!

  50. paige says:
    June 14, 2011 at 1:27 PM

    any real info about this could save my home loviewv64@yahoo.com

Newer Comments »

Leave a Reply

Click here to cancel reply.

« Previous Entries
Next Entries »

More posts in this category

  • Facebook Etiquette
  • The Evil that is Women
  • Marisol Valles Garcia: Bad Ass
  • California May Legalize the Whacky Tobacky
  • Anti Bully Law!?
  • This Categorys RSS Feed

Recent Comments

  • bobby jones on Selling a Testicle For Money
  • bobby jones on Selling a Testicle For Money
  • Dan Hatcher on Billionaires Donating Their Money!?
  • Kj on Flo The Progressive Insurance Lady and Why She Should Die
  • andree on Selling a Testicle For Money
  • Graham Senese on A Muslim Place of Worship in Downtown New York.
  • James on Screaming children will not be tolerated
  • larry on Selling a Testicle For Money
  • Felton Pruner on Hangovers and You
  • Gene Marturano on ExtenZe: Make Your Weener Bigger!

Partners

Copyright © This Hot Fire.